Over the years, I have benefited greatly from journaling about daily events and difficult interactions. I’ve also found insight and healing from the creative writing I have done about various life experiences, some of which I have shared publicly. I’ve talked to many others who have had the same experience with writing. All of us have also benefited greatly from reading other people’s writings in which they share their experiences and insights. Occasionally, however, I have encountered situations where writing has not been beneficial, where it has made people feel worse and, at times, has even led to further harm. I wanted to address those situations, specifically, to ensure that those who are drawn to writing as a way of processing and externalizing thoughts, feelings and experiences can get and give the most from this beautiful art form.  

Writing, particularly writing about one’s own life, is well known to have therapeutic benefits (Baikie & Wilhelm, 2018) If you’ve never written about a past event, putting it in writing can help to get it outside of yourself and give relief, but

1. Revisiting an event over and over with no new perspective is not helpful.

Rewriting the same story, or the same feelings about the same situation, doesn’t always result in new perspectives or less intense feelings. Sometimes it just confirms what you already feel, which might not be helpful. Sometimes it can actually be re-traumatizing, by having you relive difficult experiences with no shift or relief. If you find yourself going back to the same events over and over, with no change in your feelings or in their intensity, you may need some support to better process your experience. Consider talking to a therapist or a support group before continuing with your writing.

Ranting on the page can be useful when you just need to let it out, but only if you can leave it there and move on, maybe even tearing it up or burning it. But ranting sometimes just leads to more ranting and can build up more negative feelings than when you started. Martine, Coyier & Schroeder, et al. (2012) Looked at the emotional state of those who used internet rant sites to “let off steam” and found that they felt angrier and more negative after posting than before.

2. If you find that you cannot walk away from what you’ve written, and the feelings are just building, you may need help

to process these feelings from someone who can offer good perspective in order to move forward without staying stuck.

Sharing insights that you have gained through experience or study can be valuable to yourself and others. Most of us have benefited from hearing about others’ growth and insights. But I have also talked to people and experienced the negative effects of reading a “self help” book or story which implied that if the author’s solutions didn’t work for me, it must be my fault.

3. Writing your own story as a ‘lesson to others’ without considering that other ways of knowing or perspectives might also be beneficial, risks entrenching you in your own biases and becoming judgmental of those who do not take them to heart.

This can reduce your own mental flexibility and prevent further growth. Consider exploring other ways of thinking, knowing, and seeing the world in order ensure that you understand your own context as “one way” of seeing/experiencing things. Your experiences and knowledge are valid and may be quite helpful to others but are not “the only way” to see things. Understanding that no one is the expert in someone else’s life, before sharing your own, will add to your own growth and wisdom and make your message even more useful.

Writing your truth about a situation or experience, particularly when your perspective has been silenced or maligned, can be a great way to ground yourself and find strength and even (Cross, 2017). But

4. If you are writing in hopes of convincing those who hurt you of your perspective, or to ‘call them out,’ you risk making yourself more vulnerable.

This might not cause you harm if you have great supports and are feeling mentally stable and grounded. For some, it can even result in true justice. But know that the outcome of your writing, once shared, is out of your hands. If you feel ready to do this, it is important to ensure that you are protected and supported, emotionally and mentally, for whatever the response to your writing might be. It may be helpful to share your writing, at least initially, with those who have never silenced or maligned you, and who you know care about you, before sharing it more broadly.

Writing about your life and sharing it with others because you love writing and find it a great way to express yourself is a beautiful thing. You don’t even have to have had any particularly extraordinary experiences to have something of value to share. But

5. Sharing your experiences without acknowledging your place is society, in terms of privilege, particularly when you have a lot of privilege, (i.e. white, middle/upper class, straight, etc.) risks entrenching unexamined oppression and stereotypes in yourself and society.

See (McIntosh,1990). The very fact that you have not had any particularly extraordinary experiences in life may be a sign of privilege. Writing as if your life/experiences are normal and universal risks communicating that anything that is not the same as your experience is different or strange, and thus potentially wrong or bad. This concept of causing harm, without intending to, can be confusing to people who have not experienced much oppression and who believe that their good intensions are enough to prevent harm. For sure, you want to look at your intentions, but the trickiest part is to examine the unexamined, the unnamed, what is not being acknowledged in your experience. It is not your job to acknowledge all others’ experiences, but simply to name yours as potentially unique compared to many others in the world. It is also important to understand what systems and norms may contribute to your place in the world. Consider reading the memoirs of people who have little in common with you to understand what might be seen as “different” in your own life experience.

The good news is, all of these things can be addressed with attention, good support, and resources – one of which is an upcoming, two day, in person, creative memoir writing, therapeutic workshop that I am offering May 2nd and 3rd, 2026 in Winnipeg, Manitoba! A small group of us will support each other in the work needed to allow our writing to be transformative and therapeutic. No previous writing experience is necessary, and there is no need to have any kind of specific plan for your writing in the future.  We will be using a wide variety of creative writing exercises, including playwriting, poetry, life as a dream, and many more to examine our lives in new ways, finding transformation and healing in the process.  

Register here: The Village Well Creative Memoir Writing- A Therapy Workshop

Deadline for registration is April 27, 2026.

*Note workshop fees may be covered by insurance that covers therapy with a registered social worker.

References

Baikie, K.A. & Wilhelm, K. (2005). Emotional and physical health benefits of expressive     writing. Advances in Psychiatric Treatment. (11 , 5).  pp. 338 – 346. DOI: https://doi.org/10.1192/apt.11.5.338.

Cross, J. (2017). Writing Ourselves Whole: Using the Power of Your Own Creativity to Recover and Heal from Sexual Trauma. Mango Publishing.

Martine, R.C., Coyier, K.R., Schroeder, K.L, et al. (2012). Anger on the internet: The perceived value of rant-sites. Cybersecurity, Behaviour & Social Networking. (16,  2) https://doi.org/10.1089/cyber.2012.0130.

McIntosh, P. & Cleveland, C. (1990). White privilege: unpacking the invisible knapsack. https://jstor.org/stable/community.30714426.https://admin.artsci.washington.edu/sites/adming/files/unpacking-invisible-knapsack.pdf