Historically, I have paid much closer attention to my dreams than to my nightmares, I have discovered that, like my waking life, looking closely at the things that cause me fear and shame, has been very effective in helping me to understand areas of my self that require attention and have, surprisingly to me, greatly reduced their intensity and frequency.
In some dreams I've felt comforted by being able to see other aspects of myself and understand emotions that I’ve paid less attention to during the day.
Georgia sprained her ankle recently and wants her husband to pick up the slack with the housework. Dennis wants the holiday time he asked for and was denied by his manager. Joyce wants her siblings to pitch in with caring for their mother who has cancer and is needing a lot of support. Sabrine wants her … Continue reading How to Ask for What you Want
Men learn that emotions, and emotional connection are, at best, distractions (unless they are a means to money or sex) and, at worse, anathema to true masculinity.
As women, most of us are told in one way or another throughout the course of our lives, that we are only really welcome in the world if our bodies are found to be attractive to other people based on the beauty standards of our time.
Being sex positive means not only accepting, but embracing and celebrating the wide spectrum of sexual expressions and identities that exist in our world ranging from highly sexual to asexual.
Imagine talking to your body parts lovingly, imagine them talking to you. These are your treasures that you get to keep
Our society has a history of toxic sexuality. Starting with the Puritans who saw sexuality as evil and needing to be 'cut off' shame and blame have been part of our relationship with our sexuality.
That compassion changed things for me. It felt like a re-write of my story. It felt like a shame lifter. It felt like I could forgive myself and even discover that no forgiveness was necessary. It was powerful.
When family members behave in ways that are abusive or unsafe, many of us respond with our childhood responses, fight, flight or freeze.