Most of us know that the December holiday season is not all merry and bright for many people, however we feel somehow that it is supposed to be, and when it isn't for us, there is a disconnect that can be incredibly painful. Here are some ways to care for yourself during this holiday season:
According to attachment theory humans require an emotional foundation from which to hope and risk and venture out. I've shared where I find my security in hopes that you might discover yours.
If we have experienced trauma in our lives, our system may be on high alert and send adrenalin through our bodies even when it is not needed.
Understanding the basic styles of attachment is the first step to healing any attachment wounds you may have.
"...the more you fail to experience your life fully, the more you will fear death." ---Irvin Yalom
People come to counseling for all kinds of reasons. There is no wrong reason to talk to a counsellor, here are some issues that counselling can be particularly helpful with.
Start by thinking back to previous years, what was the most enjoyable parts of previous seasons? Make sure that those things are central in your planning, in terms of how much time you spend on these, versus the parts you enjoyed the least.
Continuing to avoid things we know we will need to face means that we are carrying an extra weight, even when we think we are ignoring it.
The question, at this point in history, while working our way out of a time when grief has been so pathologized, might be, how do we know when there is a problem with grief?